I've always believed that genetics are a bit like playing the lottery. The difference? In this game, you don’t get to choose your numbers—you’re handed a random combination of traits, like a quick-pick ticket with endless possibilities.
Understanding your genetic history is a fundamental right. It impacts so many aspects of your life, including your health. That’s why every new doctor asks you to complete a medical history form. Without this knowledge, a doctor may struggle to provide the best care. As parents, it’s our responsibility to pass down this information to our children, no matter how difficult or revealing it might be.
When my daughter and grandson were both diagnosed with different forms of Myotonic Dystrophy Type 1, I naturally assumed the condition came from my side of the family. I immediately alerted relatives to consider being tested. Imagine my shock when my genetic test came back negative. I had not passed the condition to my daughter. Two separate teams of geneticists confirmed that the likelihood of a spontaneous mutation causing Blaize’s condition was astronomically low—almost a one-in-a-trillion chance. The data indicated that the genetic repeat must have been inherited from her father, not me.
Following these revelations, I had to break the news to my daughter and her husband. Contrary to initial assumptions, her Myotonic Dystrophy had come from her father’s side of the family. This raised serious concerns, as Blaize’s father had other children, including several daughters of childbearing age. Despite my hesitation, I agreed to help Blaize communicate this important genetic information to her father, his new wife, and her half-siblings. However, this effort was met with outright denial, a common response in families dealing with this disorder. Her father’s wife, who shares five children with him, completely dismissed Blaize’s concerns. Blaize was left heartbroken and consumed with worry for her siblings, and I found myself trying once again to help her heal from the emotional fallout.
Let me say this loud and clear: children should never bear the weight of grudges between parents or their new partners—girlfriends, boyfriends, spouses, or otherwise.
As I’ve met with extended family—cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandparents—I’ve noticed patterns in our genetic traits. Most of us share common features, like blonde hair and blue eyes or ash-brown hair paired with hazel or brown eyes. Then my daughter, Blaize, was born with striking red hair and bluish-grey eyes, traits no one else seemed to have. Years later, my grandson Zayden arrived. At birth, he had jet-black hair and onyx-black eyes—a stark contrast to anyone in the family. Over time, his hair lightened to ash brown, but his eyes have remained a deep black.
Genetics also shape more than just appearance. My father stood an incredible 6’9” tall, while my mother was petite at barely 5 feet. My twin and I landed somewhere in the middle at around 5’5”. Blaize, however, barely reached 5 feet, even though her father was 5’11”. Meanwhile, other family members have grown as tall as 5’9” or more.
Our genetic makeup is a shared legacy—passed from parent to child, generation after generation. For better or worse, it’s a part of who we are.
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